we were fated to pretend

"I will carry 17 grocery bags or die trying before making two trips."

— (via sarcasmfluently)

myownpersonalstar:

kauvera:

supernatural-aka-tearsandgay:

wiener-cest:

demeaniac:

STOP SCROLLING

straighten your back, mate

NOW GO ON

woah thanks i really needed that today

tumblr user demeaniac doing little favors for tumblr one post at a time

FUCK THIS POST HAS SHOWED UP LIKE 10 TIMES TODAY AND I HAVE BEEN HUNCHED OVER EVERY FUCKING TIME

PLEASE KEEP THIS GOING it is the best reminder for me ever and I always need it omg

Im lying down how do I do this

slaughteroftheweeaboos:

ppl my age have children what the hell i am a children

ugly:

do u ever see a dog and ur like wow i want that dog

"Stay single until someone actually compliments your life in a way that makes it better not to be single. If not, it’s not worth it."

— (via sufferxthexagony)

"I am trying to see things in perspective. My dog wants a bite of my peanut butter chocolate chip bagel. I know she cannot have this, because chocolate makes dogs very sick. My dog does not understand this. She pouts and wraps herself around my leg like a scarf and purrs and tries to convince me to give her just a tiny bit. When I do not give in, she eventually gives up and lays in the corner, under the piano, drooping and sad. I hope the universe has my best interest in mind like I have my dog’s. When I want something with my whole being, and the universe withholds it from me, I hope the universe thinks to herself: "Silly girl. She thinks this is what she wants, but she does not understand how it will hurt."

— THEORIES ABOUT THE UNIVERSE by Blythe Baird  (via lovequotesrus)

"If you don’t end up smiling while you are kissing someone, you are probably kissing the wrong person."

— I wish I learned this before (via lil-plant-princess)

thepeoplesrecord:

"I’d like to raise both of my middle fingers to him and anyone who thinks profanity is somehow more harmful to our children than images of violence and misogyny."

batfricker:

im just a simple blogger, i wake up at 4 am to tend to my meme crop, i dont want any trouble

supertubos:

Dylan Rieder
photo: Mark Oblow